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Sunday, May 08, 2005

Holy Shit!

So this morning per usual I was eating my cereal and watching tv and a commercial for Oprah came on. It was a black screeen and Oprah's voice says "I have a deep, dark, secret" and the words "deep, dark secret" appeared in white on the screen. Then it goes to Oprah standing on the stage and says....
ME AND STEDMAN HAVE A DAUGHTER!!!!!!!!!
Jigga what??!!!???
Can it be true that Oprah has birthed a child and hid her from the public? Not since the press hid FDR being a cripple has any cover up been so scandalous. Or maybe Stedman has a child from another relationship (but how does a gay man get pregnant?). Or can it be that Oprah gave a baby up for adoption? Or do they mean child in the spiritual/emotional sense-like there's a neighborhood kid they're fond of? And doesn't this explain Oprah's flutuating weight gain/loss (but not her horrible hair in the 80s).

I'm so horribly sad I have to work tomorrow, but I'm making my mom watch it. I suggest everyone tune in for this earth shattering news.

3 Comments:

  • I heard she was talking about her dog. I TiVoed the episode so I'll confirm that, but I'm pretty sure it's her dog. What a letdown, I was really hoping her and the Sted-ster had some better secrets.

    By Blogger Eileen, at 6:30 PM  

  • Let me know...

    By Blogger Erin, at 2:52 PM  

  • It is her dog. Crazy!

    By Blogger Eileen, at 1:46 PM  

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